Changing the Story
By Carolyn Campbell

What a wild ride it’s been.
What a confusing time it is.
A simple change in the ‘story’ can make all the difference.

The stories we tell. The stories we live out. Everywhere. Every minute. Story is central to our life. It is how we define ourselves and our relationships. They are everywhere! Which story do I listen to? Which story do I live by? How do we unite our stories with others’ to create a greater legacy for all?

I’ve started to notice how entrenched people are in their life story…how entrenched I’ve been in my own. It’s been amazing to witness how powerfully attached we become to story—about ourselves, our relationships with others, and what we can do. Professionally, I’ve been increasingly surprised by the ‘mechanical’ nature of so many businesses as they reach out in their communities. Seemingly inspired, they tend to come through the back door with a very ‘story-like’ sales pitch.

This is my realization and my mission for this year: telling and living the story that truly matters, the one that honors and inspires for the bigger purpose. As for the moments when we haven’t done so…well, those are done. Let them go. For the moments yet to be, let them be stories told with intention. And, for those moments when we flounder, ah, in those moments let’s try again. This is my true aim for the year 2010.

Sound like a big task? Well, actually, it’s really not.

Recently I was asked to help Hands-On Portland, an amazing nonprofit. I met their executive director, Andy, at a conference last summer. He asked me to help his staff create compelling stories that move beyond simply asking for support and truly engage their community. As we planned the workshop, I discovered that within the organization exists a ‘we-focused’, inclusive culture in which they challenge and support each other. The staff’s commitment to each other and their cause is truly inspiring.

Their challenge was to expand this culture of connection, support and challenge to include their external community. One young staff member nailed it when she said, “We seem to use this nice little formula…tell them what we’re doing, pat ourselves on the back, then ask them for support.” I asked them, “What if you stopped being ‘nice’ and ‘polite’? What kind of stories might you tell?”

One woman seemed to just stop for a moment. Her stopping, stopped the room. “If I do this,” she said, “it means that I have to be vulnerable. I have to dare to move beyond the polite chatter and expose myself.”

What if you dared to challenge a convention?
What if you faced a controversy head on?
What if you broke a myth?
What if you spoke the unspoken?

What would you really talk about? How might that juice up your own writing? How might that incite others to wake up or live, work or relate in a new way?

As the group began to think this way, they started to consider stories that challenged the whole idea of what volunteering is. They started to imagine writing about what it really costs to make change. They started thinking about how to include their volunteers in writing stories. They became re-inspired to really write stories that do more that just ‘ask’.

And the truth is, folks, we know when it’s just another story to sell something. We are savvy consumers. And we are tired of it. Inspire us to think bigger. Add humor. Let us see your personality. It will be far more engaging.

At the end of the session, one guy aptly stated, “This way, I get to respect my reader in a new way. To engage them more fully without always having a hidden agenda. And to trust them more.”

The next week they published a letter to volunteers about what to do in inclement weather. Rather than the standard message, their bulletin evolved into a fun, must-read posting including pictures of some of the most twisted, mind-blowing storms with humorous captions about various conditions. You couldn’t help but read it and share it!

If you are out there to make a difference, to shift a way of thinking, then for goodness’ sake, dare to shift it. You don’t have to be Tolstoy. You just have to dare to be noticed. Get attention, and please, stop being so nice!